Jokes

1. An iPhone only costs US$199 and you get an upgraded model every year. 2. If you don’t get access to the software on the iPhone you can reboot it in two minutes and your guaranteed to get right in there. 3. If you get bored with the software on the iPhone, you can...
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1. I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock. Plus I have an iPhone! 2. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put u and iPhone together. 3. Hey baby. iPhone you tomorrow? 4. Hi. My friend over there bet you wouldn’t let me Google you on our first date. So...
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Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got? Paddy: Seven! Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got? Paddy: Seven! Teacher: Let’s try this another way....
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A doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly afterward, she told him that she was pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a sum of money and asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there. “But how will I let you know the baby is...
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A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job. The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks “What do two plus two equal?” The mathematician replies “Four.” The interviewer asks “Four, exactly?” The mathematician looks at the interviewer incredulously and says “Yes, four, exactly.” Then the interviewer calls in the accountant...
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How bankers do it… Bankers do it risk-free. Bankers do it just for money. Bankers charge a fee each time they do it. Bankers do it with varying rates of interest. Bankers do it with a penalty for early withdrawal.
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1. You go to get a balance inquiry, and instead of printing out a receipt the screen says: “Not worth wasting paper”, and ejects your card. You try to get a balance inquiry, and the screen says: “Account not found.” and keeps your card. 2. You insert your card, and try to get some...
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A man walks into a New York City bank and says he wants to borrow $2,000 for three weeks. The loan officer asks him what kind of collateral he has. The man says “I’ve got a Rolls Royce — keep it until the loan is paid off — here are the keys.” The loan...
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Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. “I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it’s the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others” he is told by the doorman....
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